By Fiona Summerville
Chapter Three
As a paralegal, my work consists of
quite a bit of research, on and off line, so taking a few moments at lunch to surf
the internet on my obsession du jour seemed harmless. I typed in my first query:
“should I let him spank me” and hit enter. My eyes grew wide. Wow! 58,300
results in thirty seconds. Apparently there was a lot of spanking research
going on in the land of Google. I garnered an odd sense of comfort knowing I
wasn’t the only one curious or in the same position.
I clicked on the first result that
caught my eye. In it, a woman's husband had wanted to spank her for many years
and recently she had caught him masturbating to images online because his urges
had gotten out of control. She asked her
fellow cyber “spankees” for advice on whether or not to give in to his wishes. The
majority of the people told her to go for it. Wow. I couldn’t believe this had been an ever present specter in
her marriage for years and she was
only now dealing with it. I suppose I was fortunate that Thomas had been up
front with me about his desires right away.
I moved on to another result. This
one discussed all the various techniques that could be employed to spank a
person. Gah! I’d never thought there
might be so many different ways Thomas could spank me. Unfortunately, now that
it had been brought to my attention, my mind did what my mind does so well and
started over-thinking the possibilities. My body, not to be outdone, responded
in kind by getting over-stimulated. Probably not the best of ideas since I was
at work, but the damage was done. So
there I sat, dipping my baby carrots into ranch dressing as I imagined all the
different ways Thomas might want to deliver my punishment. Bent over, or over
his knee? With or without panties? Indoors? Outdoors? With or without an
audience? God, the possibilities were endless and each one made me squirm in my
chair a little more.
However enlightening, the information also gave me pause. Did
I really want Thomas to spank me? If I did, that meant I’d have to
intentionally break one of his rules. Was I prepared to do that?
Yes, no, no... Maybe?
Enough! It was all too much. I had to
stop. Shutting down my browser, I tossed the last of my lunch in the trash and
headed downstairs to clear my head.
Later that afternoon I bumped into Keith, one of the firm's junior
associates, when I stopped by the kitchen for my 3:30 cup of coffee and candy break.
He sauntered over to the vending machine and leaned against it while I waited
for it to dispense my candy bar. He gave me an odd, bordering on creepy,
grin.
“Soooo, Maxi, who wants to spank you?”
"Excuse me?"
"Your web search. I saw it."
Fuck! I knew I should have cleared my cache. "What
were you doing on my computer?"
"George and I were in the middle of a meeting on the
Valencia Villas case and his computer froze up. You were still at lunch, so I
jumped on your computer to look something up.” He leered at me. “I had no idea
you were so…”
"So, what?"
"Kink-kay.”
Ugh! I shuddered. The
long drawn out way he uttered the word made me want to seek both a shower and a
vaccination. As I stooped to retrieve my
candy bar from the bin, I could feel Keith’s lecherous stare still boring into
me. I stood and locked eyes with him.
"Oh, I am, Keith," I leered, moving in on him
until he was backed up firmly against the wall. "I'm really into spanking…men. Hard. I use a paddle or a riding crop and I whip them until they cry like little girls.” I took a deep
shuddering breath in and expelled it. “It really turns me on."
Giving him one last soul withering look, I turned on my
heel, and walked out of the kitchen. It felt good to shock the slimy weasel’s
sensibilities. But as I walked back to my desk, I panicked as I wondered
how long it would take before that wicked little rumor spread throughout the
office. Fabulous...just freakin’
fabulous.
***
After that little incident, I decided it would be in my best
interest to do my research at home. But that presented an entirely different
set of problems as one of Thomas' rules was that I wasn't supposed to look at
porn without him. Unfortunately, as one might imagine, researching spanking and BDSM online tended to lead to viewing porn at some point during the research, so once again, I was in a quandary. Did I heed his warning and suspend all forms of research, or did I continue? I still had too many unanswered questions for me to quit, so I continued on with my quest for knowledge of all things BDSM.
Keep in mind, I'm not a stupid girl and I could have covered my tracks by deleting my browser history, but I didn't bother. I never thought he would check. Ok…that’s a lie. A part of me
hoped he would check. Thomas's punishment for surfing porn, or as I liked to call it “doing research”, without him amounted
to a clamp on my clit. I had no idea what that entailed, but I had to admit the thought intrigued
me. So, the next time Thomas was over I left him in the bedroom
while I took a shower, and I left the computer on. Oops! Remember...self-sabotage is
my middle name.
When I came out of the bathroom, he was standing in the
hallway, his arms crossed over his chest, wearing a look that told me he had
checked. Oh, boy.
"Are you ready?"
Although I had, consciously or subconsciously, set the wheels
of this train in motion, I shook my head.
"Then you’d better get
ready."
He took me by the hand and led me to the bed. He pulled off
my robe and laid me back on the mattress. I watched curiously as he pulled open the
drawer to my nightstand. Apparently he’d given this some forethought because I
don't keep anything that could remotely be construed as a sex toy in my nightstand.
As he withdrew an alligator clip, I whimpered and tried to sit up, but he
pushed me back down.
"Maxi, spread your lips apart."
Put that clip down, and I might. My gaze bounced from the clip in his hand to his coal black
eyes and back again. I couldn’t bring myself to move.
"I said, spread your lips apart.” His voice was firmer,
edgier.
This time, I did what he said, and when he captured my clit
with the clamp, the moan that burst from my lips was like no sound I’d ever
made. It was guttural, primal and reverberated throughout the room. God, I
hoped my neighbors weren’t home.
"I think we need to have another talk, Maxi," he
said. I tried to focus on his words, I really did, but the only thing I could
think about was the searing pain radiating from my core. The clamp was tight,
my clit was throbbing and Thomas was speaking to me in near conversational
tones. What. The. Fuck. "I think I need to elucidate on what i expect from you as my partner."
Really? He was
choosing this particular moment to
have the relationship talk? Was he fucking serious? My breath was coming out in
hiccups as I poured every ounce of willpower I had into lying still and not
crying out.
"I like to play," he said softly.
A tiny whimper escaped my lips. He considered this play? My mind reeled as I tried to understand how such an excruciating pain could even remotely be considered playful, and for whom. Because, at that moment, I certainly wasn’t feeling it.
"You’re not following me, are you?"
I bit my lip and shook my head.
"I’ve tried to ease you into this," he said,
"I needed to be sure that this was something you wanted. Not everyone can
appreciate my sort of play, but I think you
do. The thought of it makes you wet, but that’s just the buildup. See, the real
satisfaction comes in that space between pain and pleasure. The release, or
surrender. Here, let me show you." He took the clamp off, replacing the
jagged metal teeth with the softness and warmth of his mouth. The pain of the
clamp dissolved into a pulsing desire which rolled right into a mind blowing orgasm
under his ministrations.
Now, I understood. In the right situation and in the
right hands the line between pain and pleasure became blurred. I loved the end
result. I just wasn’t sure if I could endure everything that led up to it, but with Thomas, I might be willing to try.
He slid up beside me and smiled. "Are you ready to
listen now, baby?"
I smiled and purred my assent as the last of the orgasm
shuddered through me. Wait, where did he
get that blindfold? I blinked and pulled away slightly. He must have read
the trepidation in my eyes.
"Shhh...It helps your focus. Trust me,” he whispered
against my ear as he slid the black silk over my eyes.
I did trust him. I
trusted him more than I had trusted anyone in years. I found comfort in that knowledge, but at the
same time there was something patently worrisome about not being able to see him
or what he was doing.
"I try never to come on too strong," he murmured as
his fingers began to roam over my body. I shivered. His voice was hushed. His touch
was languorous, hypnotic. "My intent is not to scare. I haven’t scared
you, have I?"
I shook my head.
"But you’re curious. I saw the sorts of things you were
looking up online."
I drew in a sharp breath, and I felt my skin flush with
embarrassment.
"Don’t worry, baby. Curiosity is a good thing," he
whispered as his teeth nipped at my ear lobe. "It’s important for you to know
what you want. Important to understand what I can give you. If you're not
curious, this isn’t going to work."
His lips found my breasts and he suckled and laved each of
them, his fingers pinching one while his lips concentrated on the other. He was
right, the blindfold did help. It heightened the sensation of every kiss, every
lick, and every feather-light touch. As
he kissed his way down my body, he continued talking.
“But here’s the thing, Maxi, if you’re not open with me,
we can't do this. We can’t be together. You need to be able to tell me where
your boundaries are. What lines I can, and can’t cross."
His mouth hovered just over my mound, his breath tickling
and heating that which was already enflamed and approaching four-alarm fire
status, but he just…kept…talking.
"I'm good,” he said, his tongue flicking across my clit,
"but you have to be my guide."
"So, before we take this little adventure any further, I
need you to come up with a safe word. I know you understand its purpose.
Remember, I saw your search history." I could feel his lips curl into a
smile as he worked me toward my second orgasm. "Make sure you have it the
next time we meet."
I tried to say yes, but I could only scream as his mouth sent
me careening over the edge again and my body splintered into a million orgasmic
shards.